“Pub” has been a big supporter of the site from day one. He is an absolutely dedicated father and they type of guy that deserves all the recognition he can get. Deeply loyal to those he cares for, he’s not only a modern day dad, but an inspiration for what a man should be. I’m fortunate to have talked with him on a few occasions and each time left the conversation feeling like I had talked to a friend I had known for years. That’s just the kind of guy “Pub” is. He’s a good man, and it’s my pleasure to share this heavy and crucial feature with you.
1. Tell us about what you do, who you are, and how you balance your career with being a dad?
My name is JP “Pub” Melisz, I’m a chef, I’m a punk rocker, and most importantly I’m a single father to two amazing little girls Mickey and Ramona. Being a chef is not the easiest job to balance career and fatherhood, and for the first few years of my kids life I was grinding away in a restaurant 80 plus hours a week. I was working and providing for my kids but I was also barely home to be with them and be a father and as a result I missed a lot of “child firsts” and I knew I had to change something to find that balacnce with them and life. I ended up making a hard decision to move my family from New York to Texas for a job that I knew would help me find that balance. The decision has paid off and I’m able work in a positive relatively stress free environment surrounded by like minded talented professionals, I work with amazing product and in a state of the art kitchen. I get all that and at the same time I work day shifts Monday thru Friday, I have every weekend off and evenings, great family benefits, and plenty of vacation time. Life is really good, me and my girls are a happy family.
2. What does being a modern-day dad mean to you?
One thing that I try my hardest to show my kids in this modern world, is to find that balance with technology. It’s important that my kids know how to use computers and iPads etc. so they are equipped in life with technological knowledge (something I lack big time) but they also need to know that you cant live on them. You have to get outside and go on adventures and get dirty and fall down and get back up again and know your not made of glass and meet people face to face and have conversations and use manors and create friendships and bonds and most important just live life. Not just watch YouTube videos of other people living life. The world is there’s and they just need to know that it is not hard to go out and just take it and live it.
3. How did becoming a father change your life?
The whole game changes, and it changes all for the better. you no longer make decisions for yourself anymore, everything you do is for them. You learn to humble yourself and to make sacrifices and to be a better person. cause kids aren’t dumb they will learn everything from you whether its good things or a bad things, so you have to be very conscious of the kind of person your being and you have to ask yourself is the way I’m acting gonna be okay if my kids acts like this later on in life and if the answer is no then you better take the higher road or better path or make a change. Kids will make you into a better person and in return your kids will be better people.
4. Whats the greatest part about being a dad?
Coming home from work and seeing there smiling loving faces run to me with excitement, like I was Elvis fucking Presley. It’s an amazing feeling to be loved so much.
5. Can you share a funny story about being a father?
There are so many, my kids are always up to no good (in a good creative way) which usually makes for the funny stories.
Not so much a funny story but more of a proud punk dad moment. The other day I found Toni Basil “Hey Mickey” on 45 (my oldest daughters name is Mickey) and my kids were having fun dancing up a storm to it in the living room. And then the next day my youngest daughter Ramona asked me why I didn’t have the Ramones record with her name in the song. She then pulled out her piggy bank and asked if we could go buy it to dance to. It was too cute, made me tear up a little. We got right in the car drove to the record shop bought Rocket to Russia, came home and danced like little cretins to the whole album.
6. What advice can you give any new father out there?
Don’t overthink about all the things you would could and should do as a father. Just love your kids with all you have and just be there, be involved, get dirty with them, make memories, smile and laugh and get silly with each other.
Also don’t be afraid to show them your emotional side, kids don’t need a steel door tough guy emotionless father. They need to know that you are real, like them and that its okay to express your emotions and to talk and work together to make everything feel better. And last but not least my everyday advice to everything and everyone Stay Positive!!! Keep that PMA!!!