I recently got an email asking me how I knew how to be a good father, without having a father in my own life. Great question. I knew exactly what a father needed to be by thinking back to every little thing I had wished my own father was there for. I knew what to do by being shown what NOT to do.
In the media all I see are people putting fathers down. I have seen people basically diminish every role a father can take, and say that not only is he not needed but he is almost unwelcome. I think that is a pretty high and mighty stance to take. This comes from people whom had no fathers, or bad fathers, just like me. Plain and simple. However, instead of resenting my situation, I’ve vowed to make a difference in my own children’s life. Now that I’m an adult, I have a responsibility to put it behind me and move on.
This is why I get so upset when I see folks talking down on dads. Fathers should not be diminished to the idea of bumbling helpers that can’t get anything right. Fathers shouldn’t be seen as irrational fools that don’t have the patience to deal with the children. We have to set the standard that changes those opinions. Unfortunately we have to once again prove our worth by committing ourselves to our families.
This new trend which puts a Dad as a helper at best, is something that we have to stand up to. We have to actively participate in our child’s lives and commit to not standing on the sidelines.
Being a father is much more than being a monetary provider or a sperm donor. It’s being mindful of what it means to be a man, and a good one at that. We have to set an example for not just our children, but for all men. Being a father is taking an active role, and redefining what a man is, so that no one can deny the importance of a father in a child’s life.